
One of my co workers dropped a pearl of wisdom on me this weekend. This might surprise you, but this is what she said: "Coming here has become a lot easier since I have decided that I hate this place".
Probably sounds funny to say it was a pearl of wisdom...but it got me to thinkin'... The first inclination when someone says that is to say: Why do you work here if you hate it? You should move on, etc. blah blah blah. Then I realized what she was saying: I hate it here, I'm going to hate it here, but I have to work here for whatever personal reason I have and I accept that it will not ever be anything different, so I accept that.
That might sound cynical and negative, but at least it is realistic. I work it in a terrible environment. It is outdated, shabby, too small, noisy. It makes my job harder. Every day there is a new change, from charting to equipment to any other idiotic change that comes down from above. These are going to happen and I have no control over it because basically those that make the changes don't really care what I think. I can't make the ER over so the environment won't change anytime soon.
Now, lets talk about the patients. A lot of them are shitheads. Even the nice people who are nice in the real word can be shitheads in the ER. I deal with the dysfunctional, the addicted, the mentally ill, the ineffective copers, the stupid on a daily basis. It is the reality of my job. My job is thankless.
The point of all of this? Acceptance. I work in a shitty, stressful environment. A lot of the patients are shitheads. I have little control of change. I choose to keep working here. For years, I have wanted it to be different, stressed over the fact that it isn't different. Stressed over the fact that it won't change. Expected it to change. Accepting reality makes it so much easier. Look around you. This is it. This going to be it today, tomorrow, next week. You can leave or you can accept the reality that hits you in the face every day. Then when something good happens it will be a pleasant surprise
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